Teardrops and Roses
by Starberry
Summary: Jim's past...and future...


Teardrops and Roses  
  
Dedication ~* To my Dad *~  
  
*Takes place when Jim is 17*  
  
The town was lit up like a Christmas tree. All white fluttered down from the heavens, while the city lights glowed softly in its snug little nest. Shoppers huddled under hoods of finest wool as they carried their armloads of toys and gifts to their cars. A snowflake gently fluttered on the tip of Jim's nose. He looked at it crossed-eyed; receiving a cheerful laugh from Melfina who was standing near him with a large load of packages. He shook the flake away quickly at took some of the packages from her.  
  
"Thank you, Jim. Don't you just love Christmas?" she asked, her boots gently sloshing through the mush-like snow. Jim shrugged. He had never found Christmas that exciting, just another get together where Gene would tell his awful jokes long into the night hours. He sighed, wishing that he could fast forward through that part of Christmas.  
  
"What's wrong, Jim? You don't look so well," Melfina said as they loaded some of the presents into Jim's car.   
  
"Oh, just thinking about Gene's good ol' jokes," he answered, heaving another heavy package into the back- seat. The car sank under the weight of all the presents, making Melfina and Jim burst into laughter.  
  
***  
  
*Back at Starwind and Hawking Enterprises*  
  
"Hey, Gene! Got any good jokes?" Aisha asked with a laugh.  
  
"Shut up, Aisha," Gene answered, flopping onto the couch. "You wouldn't know a good joke if it smacked you in the face."  
  
Aisha sprang onto the couch in an attack position, bearing fangs.  
  
"Any Katoru Katoru knows a good joke, and you are NOT a Katoru Katoru," she said, sitting back on her legs.  
  
"Aisha…"  
  
Suzuka walked into the room, followed by a stream of smoke from the kitchen. She coughed and wiped smoke dust from her eyes.  
  
"Heh heh! Hey Suzuka, how's the turkey coming?" he asked, receiving a laugh from Aisha. Suzuka scowled at him.  
  
"You truly are a child. I told you all ready that I am an assassin, not a cook," she said, proudly sitting down on the opposite couch, ignoring the charcoal stains on her kimono. Aisha began to clean her paws.  
  
"So… if I told you to assassinate the turkey, you could do it?" Gene asked. Aisha just smirked.  
  
"Oooo, Gene Starwind…"   
  
The door flew open, filling the room with cold air. Suzuka shivered slightly and left the room. Jim walked in with packages piled up in his arms that reached near to the ceiling.   
  
"Hey…Gene! Wanna give me a hand here?" Jim asked, a tone of sarcasm in his voice. Gene frowned.  
  
"No, not especially," Jim gave Gene an evil look. 'He is so lazy. He does nothing,' Jim thought, struggling with the load of boxes.  
  
"I'll help ya, Jimmy!" Aisha said, springing from the couch. She grabbed the pile from Jim and immediately it fell all around her. Gene fell off the couch in laughter.  
  
"Gene! Help them!" Melfina said, coming in the door with a smaller pile of her own. Gene got up unhappily and picked up the presents. Aisha began to whine.  
  
'This is hopeless,' Jim thought. "I'm going outside," he said, the door slamming behind him.  
  
Melfina looked at Gene with a threatening look.   
  
"Gene, you should talk to him. He's never himself around Christmas time. Something's bothering him," she said, setting her presents down on the counter.   
  
"Jim will be fine, Mel. Don't worry about it," he said, setting his presents down on the counter next to hers.  
  
"Don't worry, he's always this way," he said, giving her a kiss on the nose. She frowned at him and walked to the door.  
  
"Well, then I'll talk to him." she said; she opened the door, the snowflakes flooding through the opening. They danced around Aisha, making her sneeze and drop her new pile of presents. Aisha burst into fits of anger.  
  
Gene shook his head.  
  
"Who will cook? Suzuka and I can't cook, and Aisha will poison us all!" he said, receiving a threatening look from Aisha. Melfina shrugged and muffled a giggle.  
  
"Nevermind, then. But, I do fear something's wrong," Melfina answered as she shut the door.  
  
***  
  
*Later that Night*  
  
Jim sat out on the curb listening to the fake laughter pounding through the walls from the inside of Starwind and Hawking Enterprises. The air was chilling, but it seemed more of a comfort then what lay inside. He shivered and lit a cigarette that he had swiped from Aisha. He smoked gently, letting the fumes fill his nostrils.  
  
"Why do I smoke?" Jim asked himself thoughtfully. He sighed and gazed out at the lonely sky. No stars seemed to shimmer in the velvety blanket… even on this, Christmas Eve. Silently he made a wish to be somewhere else, in another time. With a family, maybe.  
  
The night had been excellent, minus Gene's unending riddles. The turkey was juicy and fragrant; the table set with expert appeal. Everyone's family was there, that is… except for his and Mel's. Gene didn't really have a family, but he had invited a few close friends. Aisha had invited her parents from the Katoru Katoru Empire, but they had politely declined, sending her younger cousin, Keekida, instead. Although this had upset Aisha, she was still glad to be with one of her family. Suzuka had no family, or so it seemed to Jim... but she did enjoy the time spent with the others, who were happily sipping fragrant ciders.   
  
Family… the word cut through Jim's heart like a sheet of cold ice. He had never had one. Never known one. Maybe this is why he hated Christmas so avidly. He recalled one Christmas from a very distant past…  
  
*Flashback*  
  
His father loomed over him, a towering giant compared to the young boy. He had in his hand a package, small indeed, but yet… somehow wondrously beautiful. As all things are when you are a young child and are presented with a prized gift from someone dear to you. His dad had gently placed the small gift in Jim's hand.  
  
"There you go, Jim. Your first Christmas present."  
  
Jim had been overcome with emotion, he recalled. He had gently set it down on the lush Berber carpet of the living room… there in front of the tall Christmas tree. His eyes gleamed as he tore off the paper in excitement. What would it be? He lifted the lid of the box inside…  
  
*End Flashback*  
  
"Jim?"  
  
He snapped out of his memories, now feeling the cigarette burning into his index finger.   
  
"OW!" He dropped the incinerated cigarette to the snowy ground, gently nursing his now swollen finger.  
  
"Jim…"  
  
He looked up to see Melfina looming over him; her small frame huddled into a woolly coat.  
  
"Yes, Mel?"  
  
"You shouldn't smoke, Jim. It's not good for you," she said, lowering herself down onto the curbside next to him. He crushed the remains of the cigarette with his foot.  
  
"What is it, Mel?"  
  
"Jim… I think there's something bothering you. What is it? Please… I'm worried about you."  
  
Jim looked over at her; she looked concerned enough. He might as well tell her…   
  
"It's nothing. Just those… darned jokes again," he said nervously. He didn't want to tell anyone about what he remembered. It was the only thing he had left from then.  
  
"Oh… yes. Gene does get pretty bad every now and then… but is that really it?"  
  
He looked out at the sky again… wondering.  
  
"Yes. I'm just going to go out for a little ride around town, okay?"  
  
Melfina looked hurt that he wouldn't tell her what was bothering him. She sighed heavily and went back towards the Enterprise's establishment. Laughter could be heard inside.   
  
"Okay, just be careful. I don't want you to get hurt, Jim."  
  
"Sure, Mel. I'll be careful."  
  
Then he drove off, out into nowhere, as Mel rejoined the laughter inside.  
  
***  
  
Jim drove on and on, not knowing where he was going. He wanted to just keep driving forever. Never stop…just keep going.  
  
Finally he did stop, at a place he had never been before. The Centennial 3 Cemetery. A sigh escaped his lips slowly.   
  
"What brought me here?" he wondered in the solemn silence. No one was there. Just a lot of tombstones, sitting lonely on the hill- top.   
  
Jim shivered lightly. He had always avoided all contact with cemeteries. But now… he just needed to close a chapter in his life.  
  
He took roses out of his car, wondering to himself when he had bought them. Gently, he opened the cemetery gate.  
  
"Gyong… Happon… Hawkings…" he read as he went down the row. He stopped and stood silently at the grave.  
  
Hawkings…Hawkings… the name played over and over in his mind… tracing through his thoughts. My mother… my father… my family…  
  
Tears streamed gently down his solemn face with out him taking notice. He set down the red roses in front of his mother's grave.  
  
"Mom? Can you hear me?" he whispered, tracing her name on the stone. Tears dropped down onto the pedals, turning the red to a peach shimmer. The snow fell down around him… silent was the air.  
  
He turned to his father's grave…   
  
*Flashback*  
  
…Jim held out the watch in front of him.  
  
"Daddy? What does it do?" he asked, touching the intricate carvings on it's face.  
  
"That watch is very special, Jimmy. That symbolizes that you will always be my son. Always… that's for keeps."  
  
Jim hadn't understood it then…  
  
*End Flashback*  
  
…he took the watch from his pocket, again running his fingers over the carvings in its face… hearing the clock gently tick as the minutes rolled on. A tear splashed onto the face… making it impossible to tell what time it was.  
  
Jim gently laid it on top of his father's tombstone, the gentle brass mixing with the marble.   
  
"You'll always be my dad…" Jim whispered. "That's for keeps."  
  
Gentle footsteps crunched in the snow behind him. Jim felt a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Ready to go home, Jim?" a warm voice came from behind him. The tears gently iced on Jim's cheeks as the snow began to thicken.  
  
"Yea, Dad… let's go home," Jim said with a smile. They walked out of the graveyard and got into Jim's car.  
  
And when they got home, Gene and Jim watched from the curb as the clouds lifted and the sky became veiled with stars.  
  
{^.^} Starberry 


End file.
